And He Shall Be Known as Awesome Jones

On this week’s rant laden schmak, we talk about the awful pre-race farcical “human interest” stories, the smattering of news, our fantasy pick results (we did terribly), and picks for the Phoenix race.

Coach: Kevin Harvick

Rob: Carl Edwards

We’re back in the iTunes store

Migrating from the old feed to the new feed broke something for the iTunes store. After trying here and there to fix it for the better part of a month, I wrote to iTunes support to see if we could get our podcast listing fixed in the iTunes podcast store. A few exchanges later, I was told “podcast has been fixed, please allow 2-3 days”. So I did, checking every day for the next 9 (!) days.

Still not fixed.

I wrote back and politely asked them to recheck, at which point I received a “hello, we’re seeing it live here” email.

So I did everything I normally do to check for the feed, and lo-and-behold, it is now live again in the iTunes store.

So I guess somebody forgot to flip the “go live now” switch, but the point is that we’re back in the iTunes store.

My podcatcher app still can’t find us via search, but I imagine that will just take a couple more days to propagate through whatever search database they are using.

In the meantime, if you are still not subscribed, find us here:

Party Pooper in the Poconos

It’s here!

Almost two days earlier than last week.

A pretty boring race, but TNT made it somewhat bearable.

Picks for next week:

Coach: Dale Jr.
Rob: Greg Biffle.

All-Star Schmak Showdown Schmegegge

We schmak the showdown, the All-star race, and posit some opinions about how to improve this next year (hint – it’s not switching venues to Las Vegas).

Picks for the 600:

Coach: Kasey Kahne (again)

Rob: Jimmie Johnson

Wrong way joystick cranking at Darlington

Join us for our 82nd(!) episode of the schmak.

Lots of awesome schmak silliness, including the gyro cam sham, Darlington’s boring opening laps, the racing that broke out near the end, and a fantastic preview of the All-Star race next week. Do you have a question about the All-Star format? Eligibility for the race? It’s all here in the latest schmak.

Picks for the Sprint Open race:

Coach: Jamie McMurray
Rob: Martin Truex Jr.

Picks for the All-Star race:

Coach: Kasey Kahne
Rob: Clint Bowyer

Live Schmak – Wednesday at 6:45

We will be doing a live schmak on Wednesday, 6:45 pm Pacific Time.

Join us here:

The url will be live at 6:45 pm on Wednesday.

Weird Stuff in Richmond

This week, we schmak all things Richmond.

Penalties, tires, sprinkler malfunctions, it’s all here in the weekly Schmak of record.

Picks for next week at Talladega:

Coach: Dale Jr.

Rob: Cousin Carl Edwards

“Worshing” away the penalties at Kansas.

This week, on our Kansas 1 schmak, we discuss the new road course qualifying format, post-Texas penalties, Danica running a little bit better, and more… lots… more.

Picks for next week:

Coach: Kasey Kahne

Rob: Kyle Busch

The long awaited Texas Schmak

We recorded early on Monday, so that meant we had to make up for gained time, right?

Anyway, here’s the latest schmak, the missing bucket of fun from Texas Motor Speedway.

Picks for next week at Kansas:

Rob – Brad Keselowski.
Coach – Martin Truex, the 3rd.

Working on the schmak

The latest episode of the schmak has been recorded and will be posted later this evening, just a little late. We here at the schmak know that you expect and rely upon our timely publication and apologize for making your Tuesday morning slightly crappier.

Fontana comes alive!

This week on the schmak, we discuss the awesome racing at Fontana, what caused it to be so good, the mid-week predictions on the schmak and what went wrong, the Logano/Hamlin feud, Tony Stewart’s jackassery, and more!

Picks for Martinsville in two weeks:

Coach: Jimmie Johnson

Rob: Brad Keselowski

Twisted Knickers at Bristol

It was a greaaaat day for some greaaaat racing in the hills of Tennessee. But the schmakers still found some stuff to schmak about.

Restarts – is NASCAR just sort of letting them happen now?

Keselowski – only driver to finish in top 5 each race so far.

Dale Jr. – only other driver to finish top 10 in each race so far.

Why I haven’t picked Khane this season so far.

And of course the Denny vs. Joey thing.

Shortlist for next week at Fontucky:
Kyle Busch
Jimmie Johnson
Brad Keselowski
Dale Earnhardt Jr.
Kevin Harvick or Matt Kenseth

Watch the finish to the 2011 race – pretty darn good.

Picks for Fontucky:

Coach: Kyle Busch

Rob: Dale Jr.

Bristol schmak live 5:00 pacific

We will be love schmaking at 5 pacific today. Catch us at

Vickers vs. Hendrick – practice 1

In the latest Track Schmak podcast, we had one of the most lopsided set of picks we’ve had in a long time.

Rob picked Brian Vickers, I picked the lowest 3 Hendrick drivers – i.e., if Jimmie Johnson wins the race and Vickers finishes 2nd, Rob still wins the pool because Vickers was ahead of 3 of the Hendrick drivers. I only win if 2 or more of the Hendrick drivers beat Vickers.

Seemed like a pretty safe bet for me.

But then I saw first practice speeds:

Vickers – 9th quickest.

Kasey Kahne, 8th.
Jeff Gordon, 19th
Dale Earnhardt Jr, 22nd
Jimmie Johnson, 27th

Looks like the Coach curse is back.

Controversial Vegas

This week on the world’s best racing podcast, discuss the racing at Vegas, Keselowski’s jumped restarts, Danica Patrick’s “best” track, all the new cams (gyro, flying, thermo), Kyle Busch post race comments, & Matt Kenseth and Mike Bliss fun facts.

Picks for next week:

Rob: Brian Vickers.
Coach: The bottom 3 Hendrick drivers.

A “Constellation” Prize of a Short Track

This week, on Amurica’s favorite NASCAR nerdcast, the boys break down the parade in Phoenix.

Topics covered include:

  • Danica Update
  • Gyro Cam and Suspension Cam
  • Right Fronts, and whats up with them
  • Phoenix – NOT A SHORT TRACK
  • Busch Brothers Broadsiding the Barrier
  • Newman, will you be a MyFitnessPal buddy?
  • DW, as off the wall as ever
  • Bowyer getting mad at his crew because he ran over them

Bonus Beardless Riker bit, and more!

Picks for next week:

Rob: Jimmie Johnson
Coach: Tony Stewart

Put this in your gyro cam and schmak it

This week’s schmak, hot on the heels of the Daytona race weekend, covers a lot of ground. We debate the naming of the duals, not once acknowledging the difference in spelling between “dual” and “duel”. We also started a new segment (well, continued an old one, but now with a name!) called “NASCAR, you’re welcome” – this week, we discussed a way in which qualifying races could spice up race weekends. We also talked about that Nationwide wreck, the Daytona 500, the gyro cam, Jimmie Johnson, Dale Jr’s surge, and Danica’s great “rookie” performance. All this and more, in the schmak. Picks for next week: Rob: Mark Martin Coach: Danica Patrick (total bandwagon pick)

Schmak Unlimited

In our inagural podcast of 2013, we here at track schmak discuss:

  • the website debacle
  • our own new and improved website
  • the new car
  • Eldora
  • Danica
  • and umm, some other stuff that I can’t remember

Picks for the Daytona 500:

Coach: Kevin Harvick

Rob: Clint Bowyer

New rules this year – once your pick wins, you are not allowed to use that pick again in the regular season.

Don’t Call it a Comeback – from Phoenix

Well, that was fun. Phoenix happened, evil Jeff Gordon appeared, Brad Keselowski solidified his championship run, and a few other things happened, all covered by our podcast this week.

Other news – Nationwide to mid-Ohio, Trucks to Eldora, and more…

Picks for next week:

Coach: Kyle Busch
Rob: Tony Stewart

TrachSchmak championship scenarios – if Tony Stewart wins, Rob wins the schmak pool. If Tony Stewart finished ahead of Kyle Busch but doesn’t win, then we tie. If Kyle Busch finishes ahead of Tony Stewart, then Coach wins.

Texas Toast

Listen this week as Coach takes every position possible on rating the race, Jimmie Johnson’s consistency, halftime during the truck races, and relative points, where the top 2 contenders are tied. Speaking of ties, the schmak picks are back to tied this week. Can Rob’s pick of Jeff Gordon bring him the lead over Coach’s pick of Kasey Kahne?

We’ll find out after Phoenix.